Democrats Fumble Venezuela, Blame Trump Again

Democrats cry “crisis” while ignoring their own Venezuela mess.

Get ready for another episode of “Pin the Blame on Trump,” starring the same old cast of whining Democrats who couldn’t find Venezuela on a map if it came with a free taco. After a classified briefing on the ongoing chaos in Venezuela, House Dems like Nancy Pelosi and Senate crybabies like Chuck Schumer emerged with their usual script: everything is Trump’s fault, even though their boy Biden’s been napping at the wheel for nearly four years. Their crocodile tears over Maduro’s dictatorship are as convincing as a dollar-store Halloween mask—pure plastic, zero substance.

Let’s break this down, shall we? Democrats are clutching their pearls over Venezuela’s collapse while conveniently forgetting who’s been cheerleading “diplomacy” with dictators like Maduro. That’s right, Joe Biden’s State Department has been playing footsie with this socialist thug, easing sanctions in 2023 for vague promises of “free elections” that never happened—shocker! (Source: The New York Times). Meanwhile, they screech about Trump’s “reckless rhetoric,” even though Trump officials just told Congress there are no troops in Venezuela (Source: Politico). So, which is it, Dems? Is Trump the warmonger, or are you just mad he’s not cleaning up your mess? Pick a lane, you flip-flopping frauds.

And don’t even get me started on the sanctimonious squad of AOC and her merry band of socialists, who’ve spent years romanticizing Venezuela’s “Bolivarian Revolution” until the bread lines got too long to ignore. Now they’re decrying the “humanitarian crisis” (Source: The Guardian) without a peep about how their beloved policies turned a resource-rich nation into a dumpster fire. Rules for thee, but not for me, right? These champagne socialists wouldn’t survive a day in Caracas, yet they lecture us on “equity” from their ivory towers. Spare me the sermon, comrades—your hypocrisy smells worse than a Maduro ration line.

Here’s the kicker: while Dems wail about Trump having “no clear plan” (Source: The Economist), Biden’s grand strategy seems to be mumbling through teleprompter lines and hoping Maduro sends him a thank-you note for the sanction relief. Newsflash, geniuses: appeasing tyrants doesn’t work, and your empty virtue signaling won’t feed a single Venezuelan kid. You’ve had years to fix this, yet all we get are briefings, bluster, and blame. Maybe try leading for once, or is that too much to ask from a party that can’t even define “woman” without a focus group?

Takeaway:
Democrats: less whining, more winning—or just shut up already.

Sources:
- The New York Times: “Lawmakers Split After Classified Briefings on Venezuela”
- Politico: “Trump officials tell Congress: No troops in Venezuela”
- The Guardian: “Democrats decry Venezuela attack as Republicans defend Trump”
- The Economist: “Donald Trump still has no clear plan for Venezuela”

Disclaimer: This is satire, meant to roast liberal hypocrisy with a blowtorch of humor. If you’re offended, good—that’s the point. No threats, just truth and laughs.

Shut your suck hole, Joe Biden, and stop pretending you’re not the absentee landlord of this international disaster.

Published: 2026-01-08 | This is satirical content.