Newsom’s Smug Tweet Backfires Hilariously
Governor Hair Gel gets owned trying to dunk on Katie Miller.
Listen up, patriots, because California’s favorite wannabe dictator, Gavin Newsom, just stepped in it big time. In a desperate bid for internet clout, Pretty Boy Newsom tried to “fact-check” Katie Miller—wife of border security titan Stephen Miller—over a post on X about Greenland’s immigrant population. Newsom, with all the wit of a damp sock, snarked that she “might get pulled over by ICE” for her supposed ignorance. Oh, how clever, Gavin! Too bad your state is a sanctuary cesspool where actual criminals roam free while you play keyboard warrior.
Here’s the kicker: Newsom’s so-called “brutal fact-check” was about as accurate as a blindfolded dart throw. Katie Miller’s point was rooted in Greenland’s unique demographic stats—over 90% of its tiny population is Inuit, with strict immigration policies keeping it that way (source: World Bank data). Meanwhile, Newsom’s California has rolled out the red carpet for over 2.2 million illegal immigrants, costing taxpayers $22 billion a year in welfare, healthcare, and education (per FAIR US). Who’s the real clown here, Gav? The guy who can’t keep his own border secure but thinks he’s qualified to lecture on immigration policy is peak liberal elitism. Rules for thee, but not for me—classic Newsom, dining maskless at French Laundry while locking down the plebs.
Let’s not forget this is the same slick-haired hypocrite who’s presided over a mass exodus from California—over 800,000 residents fled between 2021 and 2023 (US Census Bureau)—thanks to his sky-high taxes, crime waves, and homeless encampments that make dystopian sci-fi look tame. Yet he’s got time to troll conservatives on X? Maybe focus on the feces-covered streets of San Francisco before you throw stones, buddy. Your state’s a punchline, and you’re the jester king.
And oh, the irony! Newsom’s sanctimonious finger-wagging comes while he’s pushing to give illegals free healthcare—estimated cost: $4.6 billion annually (California Legislative Analyst’s Office)—while veterans sleep on sidewalks. But sure, Gavin, tell us more about how Katie Miller’s the problem. You’re not just out of touch; you’re on a whole other planet. Maybe Greenland will take you.
Takeaway:
Newsom’s sanctimonious tweet proves he’s the real illegal—illegally bad at governing.
Sources:
- The Daily Beast: “Newsom Hits Stephen Miller’s Invasion-Hungry Wife With a Reality Check”
- Yahoo: “Gavin Newsom Fact-Checks Stephen Miller’s Invasion-Crazed Wife”
- FAIR US: California illegal immigration cost estimates
- US Census Bureau: California population decline data
- California Legislative Analyst’s Office: Healthcare for undocumented immigrants cost projections
- World Bank: Greenland demographic data
Shut your suck hole, Gavin Newsom, you gel-haired disaster of a governor—go fix your crumbling state before you tweet again!
Disclaimer: This is satire, intended for entertainment purposes only. No actual threats or harm are implied.
Published: 2026-01-08 | This is satirical content.